Saturday, May 10, 2008

Saturday Serenity


Today is already wonderful! I got up early, caught up on my blog (didn't end up chasing down that nap!), ironed Marky's work clothes, started laundry, took care of dishes and got ready for Kayla's performance.

She did a fantastic job! This is the first time I have really seen her involved and enjoying it and I was so excited to see her do so well. She is the oldest, tallest and blondest in her class so she was easy to pick out! She was all done up with mascara, blush and lip gloss! Her hair was as cute as ever and her little outfit was adorable. She was very proud of her little ice cream cone prop used in her dance and liked that hers was the only one that contained bubbles!

Marky has been such a big help lately! Even today was great. Some times we are like ships passing in the night and that makes everything hard. We really enjoyed our time together and I'm sad that he's at work but anxious to see him later. Dayton is determined to be a good example to him when it comes to CPAP compliance! I am going to get Mark to the same Sleep Specialist and get him all fixed up as I just don't think our family physician is best to manage such a serious matter. Sleep is everything and I've learned so much this week about how it affects your body, your daily living and your emotional well being.

I finally got to talk to my Liz today! A call from Canada has never been so exciting! She's doing well and made my whole day!! Shortly after that I got a call from silly Shell in Mexico! This was also a great surprise but the connection was no good so I didn't actually get to chat but look forward to her return on Monday. I bumped into Lizzo at Target and that was fun too! I heart friends!!!!!

The weather is absolutely beautiful today! I love the sunshine and am so motivated to do a bazillion things! Micci left for Cali so I'm hoping to steal some time with Jazzy before his fast approaching wedding day! We're all super excited and can't wait! My Mom is busy with her Mike today. They're doing all kinds of yard work and such but I'm hoping to catch up with them this afternoon despite that fact that they went to the Normandy without me this AM!!!

I've been trying to get a hold of my Rebecca and hope she is well. I've been worried about her and look forward to talking to her soon. My persistence will likely annoy her but I'm way okay with that if it means I get to assure all is well after a challenging time. My Michelle called the other day so I also need to try to get a hold of her. She's way more mobile these days with her MS but still needs lots of lovin' as she has a full plate and way too much to manage. With a little bit of luck Kristin and I will finally have lunch together next week and that's also something to look forward to!

I got to talk to the kids bright and early this AM. Dayton did AWESOME with this CPAP and I am so proud of that litlte monkey!!! He feel right asleep and kept it on until 3 AM at which point he marched in and asked his Dad why he took it off of him! Mommy Amy does a great job nurturing both of the kids and managing all of our crazy circumstances so thank you Spencer for bringing her into our lives!

I am also going to steal some more time of my Dad's today and look forward to that. Cynthia, thank you for your kind and encouraging words. That's a great picture of our little D! There are so many in my life who are so easy to love and appreciate!!!

On the B Side: I'm happy to FEEL happy.

PS Clanc I so love you and couldn't agree more with your last comment to KC!

Week in Review

Oddly enough I find that I do not post when I am stressed simply because my anxiety tends to get the best of me yet at the same time writing and processing my thoughts/words is so cathartic for me. At any rate, it was a busy week full of ups and downs and I am so grateful that it is Saturday!

We had Kayla with us all week as her Mother was out of town. The kids all played and had a great time but I'll admit the fact that K Mo had an activity every night (and on Saturday) was frustrating and seems excessive for a little person who desparately needs help in other critical areas. This on top of working full time, managing two other little people and being 7 months pregnant was a challenge. Luckily Mark stepped it up and took care of her schedule and it was really, really good for both he and his daughter.

Monday for Cinco de Mayo we invited Grandma Sugar up for dinner. It was fun for the kids to see her as it's been a while. My Mom also came over to watch the kids swim so that was really nice, too. Afterwards Shell and Chantel stopped by and let it be noted that Shell has officially been demoted as Chantel is the new 'cool' person in the kids lives! She's young, has the energy of a cyclone and plays non-stop with our giggly little bunch! She works with young children up at the U and is definitely in the right field! Even Ellie was hanging on her and begging for hugs!!!

Tuesday I drug some of the girls to see Ironman. Yes, this was the 2nd time for me and I enjoyed it just as much! It was refreshing to have a small, impromptu girls night out and I got to meet Sarah's cute Rena and yes I would like to keep her!!

Tuesday night I couldn't sleep to save my life as we were meeting with Dayton's Pulmonary/Respiratory MD in the AM. The three page report we got back from his intrinsic sleep study was disturbing to say the least and the appt ended up being over 2 hours long. The Doc was super informative and helped us to understand what is going on and just how serious the problems are. The afternoon consisted of a trip for Primary Children's Medical Center and that was no fun at all for Dayton or myself but a necessary evil.

Thursday was a mindless nightmare of small serial circumstances. I did fail my glucose test and have protein in my urine. Monday I will spend my day at St. Mark's doing hourly blood draws and such. Thankfully I can take my laptop, air card and just work from there to keep my sanity. Doc said I'm dehydrated and really need to be careful.

Friday we meet with a clinician for got Dayton set up with his CPAP gear. Dayton was a complete and total champ! He was so brave and so involved and did so amazingly well. He started his CPAP therapy last night and Mommy Amy said he did awesome and went right to sleep. It's still hard for me to know that this is now a permanent part of his little life. I keep reminding myself that it will help him tremdendously, that he is far tougher than I give him credit for and that that he is so much more resilient than myself. I am anxious to talk to him this morning.

Friday night Mark and I met up with Marcy and Jeff. We had dinner at the Training Table. While the food was sub-par we did enjoy the company and went back to their place to watch the Jazz game. The Jazz finally pulled it off and will play again on Sunday afternoon. Boozer actually had a good game and I enjoy watching Kobe fall all over himself on the deck.

I took Kayla's old bike over to Ellie's Dad's this week as they go on bike rides and such (when it isn't snowing in MAY!!). I was sad when Ellie called with a less than pleasant experience she had with the bike and her Dad and was reminded all over again how hard it is to share and not be there for their little heart aches. Again, Mommy Amy is a life saver and I need not be reminded of just how lucky the kids and I are to have her.

I actually got to touch base with my Dad during the week which is unusal these days given his new job. It's definitely been an adjustment as for years we have spoke daily. His perspective and life experiences are always enriching and I really enjoy hearing about the good he does. His heart and soul are in invested in the good of others and he is extremely gifted and able to make such a difference in the lives of even the most troubled/violent young adults. I could not do what he does and so admire his heart felt committment and determination.

Today Kayla has yet another activity that we will attend and I will likely be looking at several more homes. I can't tell you how many we saw this last week and while I know it helps us come closer to stability it is exhausting. The sale of our home will be complete this Tuesday so that's good news. I am really lookiing forward to getting the kids established and being permanent. It would be wonderful if we could make this all happen prior to the arrival of our little girl.

I continue to pack things up around the house so that when the next and FINAL move happens we will be more prepared. I am also pushing forward like crazy to further complete my Knowledge Managment project at the office. I want to do a kick A job before I take off for Maternity leave. In the mean time, I am going to enjoy my Saturday, pray for sunshine and kick through some serious laundry!

On the B Side: Being busy and *trying* to stay on top of things is so good for me. I love the daily challenges and the satisfaction that comes when you manage things well as well as the learning that comes when you don't! I love and appreciate the people in my life as they are all such an important piece of the big picture. I think it's time for a nap already today.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

29 Weeks

My day started at 6 AM this morning. I worked for an hour and a half, got the kids dressed, fed and ready for school before choking down my glucose tolerence drink and leaving at 8. I raced out the door and of course I forgot my cell phone and lost the lab order. I caught Dr. N before his office opened (thankfully) and got the lab slip I needed and sat by the door of the lab and was again fortunate that the plebotomist came in early! Nothing more fun than a timed blood test!

I made it to my appointment with Dr. N afterwards and was relieved that I am still only meausuring 1.5 weeks ahead. Last time it was 2.5 and so if it jumped to 3 or 4 it meant trouble. I also lost a pound which was fine given my weight gain last month (never get on a scale after eating at Famous Dave's!). The heart rate was perfect and sounded great. Now I go every 2 weeks.

Baby can open her eyes and can turn her head towards a source of light. Last night Dayton and I were testing this but need a stronger flashlight! Her sensory organs are well developed. Her fingernails and toenails are growing and she is beginning to regulate her own temperature. The bone marrow is completely in charge of production of the red blood cells now. She weighs about 2.5 pounds and is over 15 inches long.

I made it home in time for my meeting except I had been locked out of the house as Mark and I had swithced vehicles since he was taking the kids to school. Some days it just doesn't feel like I can get ahead to save my life!

On the B Side: I did have a little foot poking up and sticking above my ribs earlier today! It was the cutest little bump!!

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Tears From Heaven

This morning Ellie was quietly drawing when out of the blue she comes over to show me one of her works of art. She explained that it is a picture of our Liz (complete with puffy sleeves on her dress!) crying because she moved to Canada! Perhaps a more accurate depiction would be a picture of us crying given her departure!

Liz and I use to tease that she was my surrogate spouse. She stood in and she stood with me during some challenging times in my life.

She served as my family when I had none. She kept me sane and helped me to feel a sense of dignity when I had none. She treated me with extra special care when the days felt long and dark.

She always asked the hard questions and always caused me to stop, pause and see things more comprehensively. Her strength and determination are somthing that I felt and needed without any words being spoken. Her ability to look outside of herself, see the needs of others and strategically step in are incredible. She loved and cared for my children and is as my sister.

We've been together since I cracked her egg in 2000 and admittedly life just isn't the same without her. Let it be noted that I am excited for the new found happiness she has and the adventure she is living!! I love and am grateful for my Wih across time and now all of the miles between us.

On the B Side: While I am not sure what prompted Ellie to draw this I do know that we miss our Wih!

Sleepless is Salt Lake

As an infant Dayton use to snore and we thought it was cute. As a toddler her had his tonsils and adnoids removed due to chronic ear infections. The ENT found a necrotic tissue fold on one of them which explained a lot of acute illness and some really rotten breath for a small adorable little child!

He did not sleep through the night until he was almost 3 which made for some very tired parents! At the time we were working full time, going to school, tending to his little sister (who was an amazing sleeper) and his Dad was traveling!

He's now 5 and still snores like a little lumberjack. If he isn't snoring he still breathes quite heavily and wakes fairly often. A few weeks back he saw a Pulmonary Respirtory Pediatric Sleep Specialist who ordered a sleep study.



His Dad took him overnight to the center and Wendesday we go in for the results that we were originally promised could be done via a conversation over the phone. Needless to say I am just a little nervous and anxious to hear what the doctor has to report. The next step she had prescribed was a scope while he is under general anesthesia in coordination with his ENT. I guess we'll see...ugh.

He was originally apprehensive and resistent to this adventure at the sleep center. He chose his Dad to accompany him and pulled through like a champ! Children are so resilent and wonderful! If only my nerves were the same!!! Our goal is to help our little dude not be so dang fatigued.

On the B Side: I am so crazy grateful for medical insurance. I know that there are many American and also people world wide who do not have access to Medical care. It's easy to see your pay check and feel ripped off given the amount of money that is taken out for such purpose but the botom line (like it or not) is that it isn't an entitlement or a right but a privilege. Thank goodness we have been so fortunate because my children are like little petri dishes!